Without going into all the details, this one was a big disappointment. I was one of two finalists being considered as a consultant to develop a new grant-funded program. This was a great fit for my knowledge, skills, and interest. In October I had prepared and submitted a carefully researched and thought-out proposal. In November I had driven over two hours for a stimulating interview and lively discussion with the committee followed by tours of the facility and various introductions. I was excited and hopeful, and I expected to hear from them before Thanksgiving. When the final call came last week, however, it was to explain that they had agonized about the decision. They said that we were both strong candidates, and that we had presented them with two viable (although different) approaches. They said that in the end, all other things being equal, they went with proximity; the other person lives closer and would be more available in the long term. They even passed on a comment by a respected committee member (and somewhat of a celebrity) that she “adored” me. What can I say? This is one of the nicest rejections I’ve ever had. I can’t think of it as a failure, but after putting so much of myself into the possibility of this project, letting go of it leaves a hole – like the depression left from pulling up a plant in the garden. I can only hope that, as in the garden, this will create space and light for new growth.
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